Let's make this VERY simple. The biggest question is:

How much of me do I have to give up to be loved by you?

If you have to forfeit your truth to have a circle of friends, time to break the circle, because by my measure, Rebecca, that is a circle of abuse, for it demeans, diminishes and reduces who you are. Just like any other abusive relationship. Makes no difference if it's about race.

Right now everything IS about race, because it needs to be. These people don't realize the price you pay to have to survive, and daily pricks to your beautiful skin for being Black.

You owe nobody an apology for speaking your truth. Your truth is an invitation, not an insult. Those who have the courage to understand that your honesty is a gift, and who respect it, are keepers. The rest, well.

All great mansions need a little housekeeping, Rebecca.