…ther, I’m eager to attach your point to the problem of encouraging egomania from social influencers who get paid to live-stream every waking moment of their benign existence to reality TV. We not only offer a public stage with a hinting promise at our own version of celebrity status, bu…
I love this line, Jason, for several reasons. The real banality of our everyday lives is terrifying- omg I might be AVERAGE — and the onset of the internet and its endless selfies (pardon me while I vomit) is indicative of where we are. I might suggest the following
The wholesale ( I didn’t say wholesome, please) consumption of porn conveys this sense that the opposite sex is nothing more than a consumable, a veritable smorgasbord for the onlooker’s pleasure. I think that this is a part of what we’re seeing. As someone who has spent WAY too much time in online dating communities on and off for years, it’s a constant amazement that men — people in general- cannot handle the simple fact that someone might reject them. Of course they will. If my preferences run to X, and you happen to be Y, then I’m not going to respond to an outreach. Case in point- I’m a lifelong gym rat and athlete. At nearly 66, with beauty queen measurements, I am HARDLY am going to find a bitter, angry, huge-waisted old man who hasn’t seen the inside of a gym in forty years attractive. Yet these men constantly came after me, assuming that by virtue of my age I’d be desperate. No, Billy Bob, I’m not. And I like muscular, powerful men, always have, always will. That doesn’t have to be taken as a personal affront. After all, ladies and germs, we all have the choice of taking care of our selves or not, and if not, then those of us who do put in the time and the time are not going to find you appealing. That doesn’t even begin to take into account the issues of emotional maturity, which make a connection a go or no go. The outside bits are nice,. but if you’re handsome or gorgeous and a full blown asshole, hit the road, Jack.
It’s hard work out there. Personal work is hard work. And in the realm of online dating, we see how few folks are committed to it.