God help me please pick me up off the floor. The two men in my life who had large penises also had a hard time finding a date. It fucking HURTS. Especially for those of us built small (and men think, great, she’s tight) and I can tell you THAT IS NO FUCKING FUN. It splits skin, causes massive trauma, bleeding, extreme pain and there is no goddamned pleasure in this what. So. Ever.

Go find yourself a willing mare. This infantile addiction to penis size completely and totally disregards the incredible pain and discomfort such a disaster can cause most of us.

For those guys who have such an organ and love their muscle cars to boot, gentlemen, shove it up the exhaust pipe. That’s nice and tight too, and nobody gets hurt in the process.